Some Thoughts on The Value of Patience

As a blogger who is a Christian, I’ve been trying to practice asking God what He wants from my blog. I want to be willing to let God disrupt my schedule and plans because He knows what I need to be writing more than I do, and He knows what my audience needs to be reading more than I do.

If you’ve listened to the wonderful Ransomed Heart podcast, you’ll be familiar with this idea that God’s plan is often disruptive. I’ve found this perspective helpful, as well as, ahem, disruptive. This awareness has helped me to look for times when I am getting too caught up in myself and the way I think things should be done.

As far as blogging goes, this means asking God in prayer about what topics to cover next. God is like my editor who gives my blog schedule final approval. (And yes, He has swapped things around on me!) As I was thinking about my upcoming posts, I asked God, “What topic would you like me to write about next.” “Patience” was the immediate answer. So immediate that I was rather taken aback. Do I really need to work on patience that badly?!

I think that is kind of the response nowadays when someone wants to talks about patience. Do we have to talk about this? It’s not really a popular topic. In our instantaneous culture, waiting isn’t something we tolerate. We want the web page to load now, the coffee order to be up now, the problem resolved now as it is in 60 minute sitcoms.

Patience seems to have gone out of style. I’ve been interested in genealogy for some time and working with a friend to discover how we might be distantly, distantly related. To me, one of the most interesting parts about genealogy research is seeing the fascinating names and how naming trends change. (I love names—I keep a collection of names for potential story and book characters! And pets. And children…) One of the names that stood out was Patience. Yep, that virtue used to be so popular that people gave it to their daughters. It really is a beautiful name, come to think of it. And it really is a beautiful virtue.

I’m normally a pretty patient person, not easily riled up by long lines or lots of traffic, and I enjoy working on detailed projects that require careful attention. I know myself well enough to be aware that I am become progressively less patient the more hungry I get because my head starts to pound as my blood sugar drops, so I always carry food with me wherever I go. Making sure I have food is like practicing preemptive patience. (Couldn’t resist that alliteration!)

Earlier this month, however, I got really frustrated when my plans almost got derailed. Sometimes, my patience seems to suddenly vanish to who-knows-where. You see, my mom and I were planning to go shopping, and it was something we had planned for over a week, so I was excited for it. And I was having a rare morning where my symptoms were a little better, so it was the perfect time to get out of the house to enjoy something. Then something came up and we thought we’d have to cancel, and I felt far from patient with the interruption. My thoughts immediately became: Can’t one thing I go right??

Well, my impatience was premature, because we did end up getting to go after all, although it was about an hour later than we had planned. And a crazy thing happened on the drive home. All of a sudden we heard a loud rattling sound, and for a moment we couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. Then we realized that a part had come partially off of a car in front of us—it looked like something the size of a front bumper was dragging underneath the car. As the car was getting onto the freeway in front of us, my mom was able to honk and get the driver’s attention so he pulled over. The driver turned out to be an elderly man who appeared to be hard of hearing and didn’t realize part of his car had come loose.

When we were back on our way, I remarked how dangerous it could have been had he gotten on the freeway and that large car part had fallen off. Who knows what would have happened to that driver, or someone else if the piece had broken off and hit another car. My mom paused and said, “That may be why we were supposed to leave late.”

Aha.

Usually, that’s my line: “Maybe there’s a reason.” Something about having my plans interrupted made me forget that sometimes, things really do happen for a reason.

Maybe I just needed a reminder that things are going on behind the scenes that I don’t know about. Maybe I needed the reminder that God is in control and I can surrender that.  And I know this can be hard with chronic illness. But maybe, just maybe, we’ll have more trust and patience if we realize we don’t’ see the whole picture.

(Please note: it can be helpful to think to yourself “maybe there’s a reason” during life’s twists and turns, but it’s not as helpful to say to someone who is going through something major like a health crisis or a loss.)

In one of my favorite movies, The Mummy, one of the funniest moments comes when our heroes O’Connell and Evie are in a building surrounded by a mob. Evie, a treasure-hunting librarian (see why I love this movie?), is trying to translate information that can stop the mummy, while her brother Jonathan urges her to hurry. “Patience is a virtue,” she chides him. O’Connell looks around at the mob breaking into the building and counters, “Not right now it isn’t!”

And I can relate! I don’t particularly want to practice more patience right now. After doing some reflecting, I realize I’m feeling maxed out on patience at the moment. There is so much in life when you’re dealing with chronic illness that feels like an endless waiting game. So much patience is required, from waiting on hold with doctors, waiting to get into appointments, waiting for insurance approval, waiting for new meds to kick in, waiting for test results. Not to mention the colossal amount of patience as you wait to actually start to feel somewhere closer to healthy! I think anyone going through major struggles or changes in life can relate to this feeling that we’re too maxed out to be patient.

When our patience is in high demand, it’s a lot easier to feel your patience running thin. Our first reaction may be to start feeling entitled to impatience. Kind of like we earned it! Maybe just by pausing and realizing we’re overtaxed can be one step towards preemptive patience. I can feel so deeply my need for God’s help in this. Thankfully, the Spirit is more than willing to help us with that:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23 ESV

So, here I am, being disrupted in a good way, forced to mull over the value of patience. And feeling grateful because we don’t have to get to patience on our own.

Anyone else struggling with patience out there?
Have you had any recent insights or eye-opening moments when it comes to patience?

Also, will anyone be naming their daughter Patience in the future? 😉